Adulting is hard. “Just because someone carries it well, doesn’t mean that the load isn’t heavy.”
I was talking to my neighbor, who happens to be an older gentleman. He has the heart of a man that you know would do anything for you – Just like my grandfather – no matter the cynicism that falls from his lips on the daily. I asked him yesterday if life gets easier. He said “No”. 😯
The last three months of my life have been a whirlwind. Literally turned upside down and shaken. I never would have anticipated I would be standing where I am today if someone had even warned me.
I lay in my daughter’s bed last night, putting them to bed… I cried. In the darkness, it seemed a safe place to let the tears roll down my cheeks. It was peaceful in an odd way - The hurt and pain of a load sometimes too heavy to carry.
I know I’m not alone. As I lay there I had two burrowing daughters, a dog in-between my legs, another one on my feet. I had friends texting their usual banter exhibiting my world of wonderful humans around me. For that I am blessed, but the overwhelming ache of sadness and loneliness can still creep in. Being an adult can be lonely.
Today is a new day and the load I’ve accumulated will continue to be carried… No matter the weight. I’m sharing this because I want you to know – Whoever you may be – If it makes a difference to only one person - You aren’t alone in thinking adulting is difficult. We live in a world of social media bliss, but don’t be sucked in by its glamour.
Am I alone to sometimes feel like my teenage self - thrust in the body of an adult? Why didn’t someone warn me that I wouldn’t feel different? I’m nearing my 40s and STILL feel like I’m 16… Except I now have stretch marks where my babies once grew, wrinkles around my eyes, and my bones crackle and pop.
If we were closer, no matter who you are or the burden you may carry, I’d tell you – “You are enough. One day at a time. I accept you for who you are… Every piece of it." Find your Strength Through Weakness.